Tuesday, July 04, 2006

All we need is a little bit more doubt.

Do I believe all this because I have been taught it? Do I believe in the correct form of “religion”? If I am not successful, am I believing in the wrong thing?

There was a guy not long ago that told me that, “I don't believe in Jesus because the Bible tells me so”. I wanted to get out of my chair and whack him for saying such things. To make things worse, he started going off on America and politics. My blood boiled. This scrawny little know-it-all! How dare he question the Christianity of the Republican party! Didn't he get the emails I forwarded him? Sad.

Sad, not because of what he said but sad that it was what I thought five years ago. Liberal thinking still bothers me, but only because it doesn't make good business sense. Everything has changed. All my thinking about religion, politics, and money – the three things you should never bring up in a conversation.

Religion – all forms of it are designed for man to control man. That is what I believe now after searching for the truth. I have doubted many times but one thing remains – Father. No matter how many times I start to doubt that all this stuff may not exist, the one thing that remains consistent is His hand. I can see it everywhere and I can't pass this beating heart of mine off as a mathematical probability. Love, creation, joy – they all come from something and they all have similar stings running throughout – a fingerprint. The most impressive thing that Jesus did for me was not the miracles, but the trust he had in his Father. Everything that he did was what he saw the Father doing and everything that he said was what the Father said. I can't get past this.

Politics – I love listening to debates about one thing or another but it needs to stop there. I am a part of His kingdom and shall remain that way. Therefore, it only stands to reason that I shouldn't get caught up in the way man rules man rather I should be observant to my Father's voice and go where he is. Keeping my foot in politics will only allow me to have a conversation with fifty percent of the people that I meet and will blur my perception of the others.

Money – Be it luck or skill, the money or success I have or had wasn't even mine to begin with. I have struggled financially for over 4 years and I have been happier than ever. I have learned valuable lessons when it comes to jobs and such through my struggling. I have learned to be happy in good times and bad. Prosperous times and poor, Father is still with me regardless of how much I make. I no longer doubt Him when trials come my way – the word faith doesn't fit here – trust fits better. To God be the glory in everything not just the stuff that benefits me.

I'll never forget that conversation that I had with Greg Hubbard at our cabin. The conversation didn't particularly change my life, but it was a foreshadow of things to come. I praise Father for the relationship I have with Greg and I am very proud to know him.