"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go, it's pretty damned good."- Drew Carey
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."- Camille Paglia
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible."- Lynn Lavner
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."- Jack Handy
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
- Ernest Hemingway
"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
- Ernest Hemingway
"What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?"- W.C. Fields
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."- Henny Youngman
"When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"- Brian O'Rourke
"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer."
- Frank Zappa
"Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer."- Dave Barry
posted by Tera @ 9:39 AM
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